8/30/2006

Make Up Your Own Damn Post

I'll give you the first sentence. Then each of you morons can add a sentence in the comments section. Saves me from doing any work.

Here's the sentence:

Dyckerson was on his way home from a hard day at work, when all of the sudden something amazing happened.


22 comments:

Tripe Face said...

He called a woman under the age of 63 and asked for a date and she said "Yes"

flipphead said...

He decided to try to make himself happy like a dog and lick "himself". . . .all was going well until he slipped his left leg over his head while driving and lost control of the car.....slamming into a daycare and killing several small children.
As they pulled Dyckerson out of the wreckage with the jaws of life, he was happily still licking away.

karla said...

He had an epiphany wherein he realized he had frittered away too much of his life pretending to be something he's not. He decided to turn over a new leaf. From then on, he would be knows as Faggy Dyckerfag, and he would never again hold back from telling the world about his insatiable love of penis.

He also realized that he had placed too much value on money and material things, and decided to give away everything he owned to Karlababble. Everything except his extensive gay porn collection and his David Hasselhoff action figures.

Mighty Dyckerson said...

(OK, clearly this was a bad idea...)

Pud said...

A hot blonde named Pud, who has an amazing ass, asked the Mighty One if he would like to get a hop on.

ecp said...

Then Mighty Dyckerson suddenly died of a heart attack as a result of his extremely high cholesterol. He was buried in a pauper's cemetery and never heard from again.

The end.

photogguy said...

"(OK, clearly this was a bad idea...) "


That's the funniest thing I've read in days!

puerileuwaite said...

He realized that others could do a much better job posting on his own rancid blog than himself. So he returned to his natural profession as a gay prostitute and never posted again. This made the world a happier place.

jmeped said...

He realized that he ACTUALLY worked hard today. It felt good. Not like when he goes in the conner stall with his good housekeeping and the K-mart flyer. He was daydreaming of starting his own line of fine linens when he crashed into a hot blonde in a convertable. She considered letting him "pay" for the damage he had done when she eyed the stack of good housekeeping in the back seat and all the banana peelings in the floor board. This monkey is odd she thought, so she called the police. The Mighty Dykerson was arrested on the spot for bad party tricks. It is rumored that he now belongs to Bubba and is considered the official cell block 8 bitch. Sometimes when he blacks out from the ass poundings he goes to his happy place only to wake to the smell of burning hair......

the dude said...

He had an idea to graft a laser cannon to his chest, to crush those who disobey him. After making a quick trip to a Mexican hospital for "plastic surgery" he returned to destroy all east coast producers and people with tripe faces. Then he made love to a manikin. The End.

Chris said...

Is that a "hard" day of work because it stumped you or because you actually worked hard?
_____________________________

Suddenly, as Dyck was rounding the corner on his block, he saw a woman hitchhiking. He stops

"Can I get a ride?", she says.

"Sure, hop in. Where you heading?"

"Is that some kind of come on?" she purrs. She slinks in.

"Uh, maybe...say, you look kind of familiar. Do I know you?"

Messing with her hair, "I'm sure you recognize me. Most men can't get me out of their head."

"Wow. Are you a pornstar or something? You want to come home with me?"

"You know I do."

"I like you. What's your name, honey?"

"Lorena Bobbit"
___________________________________

IN LOCAL NEWS A MAN WAS KILLED TODAY WHEN HIS CAR WENT OUT OF CONTROL AND LEFT THE ROADWAY. WITNESSES SAY HE WAS SCREAMING AND GESTURING WILDLY WHILE A WOMAN IN THE PASSENGER SEAT WAS WAVING SOMETHING OUTSIDE THE CAR. THE WOMAN WAS UNINJURED.

Mighty Dyckerson said...

(Bad, bad, bad idea...)

puerileuwaite said...

Holy Shit. Something amazing DID happen. You listed me.

tfg said...

...Dyckerson realized that Jesus Christ was the answer to all of his problems, except for that recurring rash. Immediately, Dyckerson set out to atone for his immorality and proclaimed, "From here on, I will never embezzle from customers' accounts again." After that, Dyckerson was the best employee that the sperm bank ever had.

ecp said...

Didn't you all notice that I killed Dyck off 6 posts from the top? End of story, folks! He's worm food!

Tripe Face said...

ECP,

You've tried to kill off Dyck dozens of times... it never works.

Face it, you are firing blanks (pun intended)

Tripe

Little Lamb said...

He stopped using foul language.

DykesDog said...

The Mighty Dykerson realized that he was the spawn of Satan, the harvester of sorrow,the imminent end of everything you hold dear and sacred to you. He is neither good or kind. He is EVIL AND IMAGINARY. He likes to I like to read books on the Womens Issues, Serial Killers, and anything that disgraces himself. Beware of me, as I said I can be your friend or your enemy. And believe me- you want him as an Allie,TRUST ME!!! Anyways, when he is not inspiring fear, hatred, love or lust in people's heart's and souls, he will talk to anyone.

ecp said...

Tripe, no wonder you're on my list.

Manola Blablablanik said...

He went back to the office for some salsa!

Crashtest Comic said...

He looked down and realized his bra was on backwards, shot himself, and was eaten by armadillos.

~ Stacy ~ said...

I'm too late to the party to contribute. So I'll simply be content with LMAO @ all of the comments. You have some rather creative readers, Mister Dyckerson. Indeed you do.