My life is incomplete.

I am 33 years old. I own a house and a car and a thriving business. I'm a beloved icon known by millions on the Internets. But it's not enough. I feel I'm missing something. And that something is a woman.

Now most of you know me as the witty, wisecracking Dyckerson from the message boards. But there is another side to Dyckerson.....a Dyckerson who is warm, kind, compassionate, and caring......an intelligent, sincere, passionate Dyckerson. Yet somehow true love has eluded me all these years. I know, I know. Seems impossible to believe. But alas, it is true.

I don't know what it is. Maybe the ladies are intimidated by my fame, my charm, and my rugged good looks. Or perhaps every woman I've ever met is a lesbian. Your guess is as good as mine. But the future Mrs. Dyckerson is out there, and I am determined to track her down. Apparently she isn't going to come knocking on my door, so I must get out there and find her myself.

This is where you come in, fellow bloggers. I need your advice. Where do I go to find this chick? What do I wear? What do I say when I meet her? How soon should I expect to get some action? How can I get her to sign a prenup without being offended?

Please help!!


Little Lamb said...

What about Revree?

Mighty Dyckerson said...

We have an open relationship. I can see anybody I want to, and she can watch.

Purrfectly Happy said...

Oh Mighty, how sad I am that you're a year too late. Lucille was also going about life solo, saddened by the fact that no gentle man such as yourself was available. I will hope for you. I know you will meet the woman of your dreams. Keep the faith brotha, you too, will be complete one day.

Little Lamb said...

Close your relationship with Revree and make her the special one for you.

east coast producer said...


east coast producer said...

IWSS Security Event (iwss)
Access to this URL is currently restricted because of its classification.

URL: http://www.getphpbb.com/phpbb/index.php?mforum=dyckersonville
Content classification: Not Work Related

This site is blocked and your attempted access HAS BEEN RECORDED in accordance with the XXXXXXX Broadcasting Acceptable Usage Policy. If access to this site is required, PLEASE CONTACT YOUR SUPERVISOR who should then contact the IT Department. Thank you for your compliance.

Mighty Dyckerson said...

ECP, is that for real?? Of course DyckerForum is work related! DyckerForum is educational in all facets of life, including work!

Give me the name and number of your IT geek. I'm going to kick some ass.

Willo Keays said...

Dyck - poor dyck! I can only relate my own personal experience. I have been in love just three times in my life. The first - I was 18 - he was 21. A military man, we had a summer romance I will never forget. Then he shipped out and I never saw him again. Lesson learned - summer love is fleeting but is wonderful while it lasts.

The second - I met on my 21st birthday. We were married before my 22nd birthday and had a son. He was in the military too - during Desert Storm - and was gone 18 months. A year later he cheated on me and we got divorced. Lesson learned - NEVER marry the person you meet on your 21st birthday and 1st legal attempt at getting smashed!

They say the third times a charm. I met my current hubby online {SHOCK} - we spoke online for 3 months before meeting in reality at a very public party. We've been together ever since - going on 9 1/2 years. We got to know each other online very quickly because we were able to discuss stuff you wouldn't normally disucss in person. We were friends first - knew alot about each other before getting serious. Lesson learned - make sure you KNOW someone before you make that lifetime committment. This guys a keeper - and I love him with my heart and soul.

My advice to you is that love will happen when you least expect it. Heck - with all the joking around we do - RevRee, Traffic Goddess or Lamb may be that perfect person. You just havn't figured it out yet. If you have a good heart to go along with your fantastic sense of humor - true love won't be too far away!

OR - you could just go down to the local brothel and pay for temporary love - if you know what I mean! It will take your mind off of finding Ms. Right.

Willo Keays said...

Oh ... and after the third date is the approporiate Ms. Manners answer to the question "When can I expect to get some action". If you REALLY like a girl - this would be the appropriate time to make the first move.

Traffic Goddess said...

I think you should go for Kwang Chang.

Mighty Dyckerson said...

Thanks for that insight, Husho. Three dates before any action??! Can the three dates all be in one night???

And TG, Kwango is not for me. I couldn't be with a woman who gets paid to touch other men's heads all day.

minwah said...

sexy, smart, rich...and single? WOW - hope you find someone soon...and if you don't, my number is.....;-)