Good God Almighty!

Dyckerson is not a big sports fan, but I recently found myself watching the weekend sports on the local ABC station here in town, and I am in love. Check it!!

Her name is Dawn Davenport (although it will soon become Dawn Dyckerson), and she's new to town. The station's website indicates that she is from Georgia and is a fan of the Atlanta Braves and Falcons.

Now, I need to impress this chick, but as I said, I know nothing about sports. So quick. Somebody out there tell me something about these teams. Who are they and what sport do they play? What are some of the players' names? What color are their uniforms??

And please hurry. I don't want to lose out on this fine piece of ass!


WalMartNation said...

You wanna get good with this chick.. I'm always out to lend a hand when a fellow man wants to get wet with a local sports chick in a top 70 market who's under the age of 26. I'll lend a hand.
If she's a fan of the Braves, tell her you've been doing the "Tomahawk Chop" since Mark Lemke took the Braves to game 7 of the 1991 World Series against the Minnesota Twins. Tell her that when Francisco Cabrera (a short career as a backup catcher for Atlanta) singled to left in game 7 of the 1992 National League Championship Series to score Sid Bream's 78-year-old a$$ from 2nd base because Barry Bonds (then with the Pittsburgh Pirates) didn't have enough steriods in his arm to throw Bream out at home plate from short left-field... that you've always regarded the Braves as a team of Destiny.
Tell her Dave Justice is your hero for making his bold prediction of a Braves win before Game 6 of the 1995 World Series when his solo home run was the difference in a 1-0 Tom Glavine pitched victory. It clinched the only major championship in modern pro sports for Atlanta... and the last one too.
For the Falcons, tell her you curse the day that Safety Eugene Robinson decided to pick up a hooker for a blow in South Beach the night before Super Bowl 33. The destraction led to Denver's rolling of the Falcons in their only super bowl appearance. Also tell her that was the year you learned how to do the "Dirty Bird".
She'll know! Hope this helps!

Mighty Dyckerson said...

Thanks for nothing, Walmart!

I went to her house tonight and knocked on her door, wearing nothing but a smile. I started telling her all about the Braves, but she slammed the door in my face before I could get to the part about the Tomahawk Chop.

So you obviously have no idea what you're talking about.

WalMartNation said...

Sorry, I forgot to tell you to wear a Dale Murphy jersey. You should've told her you had your own version of the 'Tomahawk Chop'.